Scantron
"Electric City" EP
scum stats: holy shit, SEVEN different versions?!?!?! I haven't felt this overwhelmed and debilitated by variation since I googled "Baby Yoda toy"
So a few weeks back the folks from Lazy Boy Record Company sent over a package with FOUR copies of this record. Included was a nice, heartwarming letter that said the three blue vinyl singles (limited to 100 copies) and the lone black vinyl copy (owner's variant, limited to 25, never to be sold) were being given TO MY DAUGHTERS to do with as they wanted.
MAYBE they would gift me the owner's variant. Maybe they would review it. Maybe they would give it away elsewhere. THE POSSIBILITIES ARE LIMITLESS.
My first thought was...do the 44 different owners of the Lazy Boy co-op know what it's like to try and coordinate ANYTHING between sisters the ages of seven, four, and two years old? I CAN'T EVEN GET THEM TO BED WITHOUT YELLING...AND YOU WANT ME TO TRY COORDINATE REVIEWS AND GIVEAWAYS AT THEIR BEHEST?
I wholly welcome the inspired Scantron form though..."Dreams" has a perfectly plodding tempo that just hits the spot, sly and devoted and leaving nothing left to be desired. With rock and roll, the thin line between pastiche and pantomime is consistently muddled, yet this feels undeniably TRUE. Letting up on speed for the accomodation of groove is a welcome equation and it proves to further serve the purpose on both "In There / Out There" and "Tip Top Inn." And shit, "White Linen Sheets" is strong too. I hear little (no?) weakness here. Four PURE songs, worth your time and your ears.
But as to the issue of these four copies sitting on my desk...I think I'm gonna just throw the three blue vinyl versions into the girls' collective 45 box. I'm keeping the black vinyl copy. That's the joy of pulling the rank of dad. Unless, you, the masses, ANYONE, can convince me as to some better approach, in the comments below. No doubt some of the co-op owners of Lazy Boy will be reading this and certainly are welcome to chime in.
Dare I suggest giving away these copies here? To Vault subscribing 45 collecting freaks, versus the secret slime spilling slobs that are my kids? Am I beholden to the unsolicited request of Lazy Boy? In terms of how I choose to parent my children? Should any randos fresh out of county jail be able to send me a surprise package and expect me to oblige their request? What is "love" anyway? Who are parents? As is my favorite directive to leave with...discuss.
My wife and I decided early not to have children. It’s not our cup of tea.You could always just get rid of the kids. Seems like an easier choice. I mean, that’s always an option right? I’m not sure how this stuff works. If you decide the other route, I’d be happy to take a copy of yours off your hand. A vinyl, not a child, just to be clear.
…also passing the respect to collectibles and records is up to us as parents. I’m
I’m down for giving them to the kids, I have collection of records I’m passing down to my kiddos. The first record in the box is a message from my wife and I to both kiddos we recorded at the TMR Record. In the end, if there are extra about, we your following, would gladly take one off your hands. Here’s to 2021!
My body is not even cold and there is already sibling infighting between my daughters over certain items in my collection. Should I tell them about the McCartney?
Lazy Boy??? Do they make recliners too?
as a moderately successful parent of a 26 year old successful woman, it is my sound legal opinion you should graciously thank Scranton and mail those spinners out to deserving Vault members such as myself. Partially because your daughters will likely use these 45’s as coasters for their beer once they’re in college (or Opryland, God help them), but mainly because this music is just badass and I wants it. Mainly the latter.
well these records appear to be taking an emotional toll on you. nobody wants what. the safest thing emotionally for you is to probably get them out of the house ASAP. it’s like if you have the videotape of the Ring. you need to hide those things. someplace only only a select few would find them.
give them to your kids!
Where is #47?